Life As I See It

Who I Was vs. Who I Am Now

June 25, 2015

I have this wonderful app on my phone called timehop. The app, for those who are unfamiliar with it, shares posts from previous years from you social media accounts. I have my Facebook, Instagram and Twitter hooked up to it. I have a daily dose of entertainment.

The funniest posts are also some of my most awkward ones. Is it is a coincidence that all of those awkward but funny ones are from when I am in high school? I doubt it. It was a teaching moment for me though. Thanks to TimeHop and high school me I see how much I have grown. High school was awkward for me. High school is awkward for almost everyone. I heard few accounts from people who would go back to being who they were then. I most certainly don’t want to be that person again. I like who I am now so much better.

I do have to thank my experiences in high school for teaching me so much. It taught me it’s okay to be yourself even if it might not be what other people are looking for. To be yourself you need to open up to the person inside of you. The other thing I learned is social media etiquette. I posted endlessly on Facebook, using it as my own personal venting board. Years later I rarely post except when I share a picture on Instagram and Facebook. I don’t know if it is partially fueled by the necessity to keep my accounts professional. I do know I really enjoy not seeing posts constantly on my page.

I’m not saying I’m a social media angel. I still might over share using snapchat but my Facebook and Twitter accounts have definitely matured with me. I also learned something about myself in high school I didn’t ever want to admit. I tried so hard to fit in I posted things on my pages I don’t believe were entirely genuine. That is most upsetting for who I am now. I’ve come to accept that everyone might not like me and I might not get along with everyone. I especially won’t be best friends with every person I interact with or stay in touch with them. That is completely acceptable for me now because I am happy with who I am. I am also realistic. High schools and colleges are bubbles where people associate having a lot of friends with being cool. That is unrealistic and unhealthy. The bigger and more important thing during this time period is to be the best person you can be and learn to love yourself.

Looking back, I don’t like that I was someone who tried to fit in. I wish I had been as sure of myself then as I am now. In hindsight, I needed those awkward years of trying to fit in. My parents repeatedly say to let children make mistakes and learn from them. How I acted in high school could be considered a mistake or an experience. Either way I learned from it. I’ve stopped putting up walls and am more confident with being myself. I am comfortable questioning childhood values and talking about those questions. I really like the person I’ve become. So, thank you timehop for helping me see just how much I grew and for helping me realize how much I learned about being yourself and being comfortable with that.

A note for this new generation of Facebook users: when you post status updates do not put “is” first. I wish someone had told me how silly that sounds when I got my account 9 years ago.

Featured Image Photo Credit: http://orig12.deviantart.net/6530/f/2012/196/0/e/i__m_not_who_i_was_by_jenny_gilbert-d57ejjl.jpg

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